What’s life in my home country like nowadays?

Monica Spear and her husband (you can look up her name on your favorite web search engine) were visiting my home country; their car broke down late at night in a pitch-dark highway (is there another kind?) and when they were receiving the assistance of a tow truck, a gang descended from the nearby rancho-peppered hills and these hoodlums killed them both, hurt the couple’s five year old daughter with a bullet and stole anything that wasn’t nailed down. It was a horrendous crime.

But this is business as usual down here. We have 100 murders per 100,000 inhabitants (last time I checked), which makes my home country one of the top 5 most violent places around the globe I won’t even say the “V” word (the name of my country) in this post; it has proven dangerous to tell even the truth about it). I guess I’d star mentioning it as the Mythic Kingdom of Aleveznue from now on to avoid potential trouble (I’m wondering for how long I’ll still be able to sneak these small… commentaries, you know).

I guess you’ll be smart enough to work your way around this little anagram.

Want to know what’s life in Aleveznue like? It’s waking up at 6. AM (when it’s really 6:30 AM; the government saw the notion of setting the clock back 30 minutes as a more burning question than do something with an inflation bordering the 60 % yearly rate) and start your day hunting down your kitchen a couple of coffee teaspoons and see if you’re able to brew a decent cup of java. Want some milk with that? Good luck; maybe there’s some leftover powdered milk from the other day. In my personal experience, I haven’t seen a jar of fresh milk since 2006.

And the average, happy, Aleveznuan steps out of the door of his home wondering if he or she will ever come back alive. He or she will spend nearly six hours of his daily routine stuck in the most impressive traffic jams you could ever fantasize about. He or she will still have to put up with the regular eight hour shift, so he or she will probably reach the sanctity of their home by 9 PM…. if they didn’t cross paths with a stray bullet along their way.

Plus, the current Aleveznuan regime is purposely instilling an atmosphere of hate and total fear in to every single facet in the lives of every single citizen out there. If you want to know what’s living in Orwell’s 1984, well, come down here… I’ll show you a taste.

If you dare.

I have to live here.

You don’t.

Edwin Stark

Signing Off

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